Top 5 Regrets of the Dying

This post originally appeared in Collective Evolution
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

”This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

Are you Sending Twitter DM Spam? Here’s how to fix it.

Twitter DM spam is a drag. It kills your social proof and makes you look like a bonehead. What is Twitter spam you say? It’s usually a DM that is sent to all of your followers that says something like “Hey, so and so is saying bad things about you” or “Check out this link.” It’s usually then followed by a link.

How does someone get access to your account to send these messages? Most likely you’ve granted a third-party application permission to post on your behalf.

Twitter has a rich third-party ecosystem that can enhance how you use Twitter in all kinds of ways. Unfortunately, the dark side of this is if you can’t trust the application they can wreak havoc on your account.

So, if you are receiving messages from your followers telling you that you are sending DM spam, here’s how you can clean it up.

Firstly, login to Twitter.

  1. Go to your profile “settings” page (at https://twitter.com/settings/). Go to the Password section.
  2. Change your password to a new password, choosing something long/complex but easy to remember.
  3. Go to Settings -> Apps. Revoke access to everything you see listed here (except ‘Twitter for iPhone’).
  4. Go to Settings -> Account. Check that your e-mail address is correct (If not, update it & save changes).
  5. Sign out of Twitter.
  6. Clear your browser’s cache.
  7. Shut down your browser.
  8. Restart the browser, and then log in to Twitter using your new password.
  9. Go to Settings -> Apps.  Make sure that there are no apps left which still have access (except ‘Twitter for iPhone’).

You can also use the application MyPermissions to see which applications are connecting to your account.

Remember, to avoid this problem in the first place always make sure you know who you are giving permission to. It’s going to save you embarrassment and help protect your online reputation.

Lone Ranger Is Everything Wrong With Hollywood — Vulture

Gilbert Cruz writes a nice piece on Vulture.com espousing why the Lone Ranger Is Everything Wrong With Hollywood — Vulture.

I agree with everything he’s written here and would like to add my $.02. The death of Jonathan Kent represents everything that’s wrong with Man of Steel (and by extension Hollywood).

In the original Superman movie Jonathan Kent had a heart attack, Martha, Clark and the dog are all witnesses and they run out to try and help. It was a very emotional and intimate moment in the movie and when Martha screams “Jonathan” you feel her pain.

Juxtapose that scene with Man of Steel. Jonathan (SPOILER ALERT) is sucked up by a tornado. Gone is the intimacy, replaced with a special effects spectacular that is devoid of any emotion.

I loved the first Star Trek reboot movie not because of the action and effects but because of the characters. That’s lost on so many directors and it’s sad. Is it because it’s easier to just blow shit up? Or, do they really think that the audience is so unsophisticated that it’s what they want?

 

A Nerd’s Guide to Success and Happiness | Nerd Fitness

Steve Kamb at Nerd Fitness wrote a spectacular article on happiness. It’s worth reading the entire thing but here’s the summary.

Here’s how to build the habit of making yourself happier:

  • When you wake up, try meditating before checking your phone or turning on your computer. Even if it’s only for two minutes.
  • Do what you can to spend your time on projects you love, and less time doing work that doesn’t make you happy.
  • Spend less money on things and instead on experiences.
  • Spend time each day in “the zone” on a passion, project, or activity you love.Build something, make something, do something.
  • Incrementally improve your health, and reward yourself for it. Pick an activity or exercise to improve your physical wellbeing.  You’re in the right place!
  • Spend more time with people you love, and less time with people that drag you down. Don’t have friends or a partner? Work on your skills to find them!
  • Be grateful every day for the things that have gone right. Keep a record to remind yourself of these things.

A Nerd’s Guide to Success and Happiness | Nerd Fitness.

Is your content your own?

If you ever needed an example as to why you should be publishing content you care about on a platform you 100% control, look no further than MySpace.

In the latest attempt to pivot, MySpace removed the blog feature from the site. Why they would do this knowing full well that it would annoy their existing users is really besides the point.

If you are publishing on any platform your content is a prisoner to the whims of a business outside your control. Whether you use Tumblr, Facebook, Instagram, MySpace your content could go away at any time.

If you are a content publisher you can avoid this doomsday scenario by developing a publishing workflow where content originates on a device you control.

  • For long form content (i.e., blog posts) you can write your posts on your computer or iPad and upload it to your platform of choice. I often do this because I like to write in Markdown on my iPad and Mac. So, even if you were posting to MySpace you still have all of the originals locally.
  • If you wish to post photos from your phone, install Dropbox and have it backup all of your photos for you. Then, if you use Instagram, Hipstamatic, or just the built in camera the Dropbox app will create backups that will sync onto your computer.
  • Install WordPress on your own webhost. It’s not really that hard and if you create a regimen that backups your WordPress database you can easily move from one hosting provider to another without losing your data.
  • Status posts – if you are publishing to Twitter you can periodically get an archive of your Twitter posts.